Auto Ethnographic Inquiry

This is a fourteen week documentation of my research for my final thesis project. Ummm, well, in all honesty, it is a diary of facing my fears, literally and figuratively, by committing to draw my portrait in four distinct ways: metaphor [superhero animal], Distorted/Altered, Folk/Outsider Art inspired, and Extreme Close-Up, [realism], and document the events as they unfold. To some this may seem simple and straightforward (big whoop); however, for a person, like myself, that deals with severe, crippling self-esteem issues, this is a daunting task. However, the emotional investment is not nearly as important as the adventure/investigation and real life implications for my students. Adolescent students often fight similar self-identity issues. Inquiry: Does drawing self-portraits assist in developing a positive self-identity? Or is it merely an exercise in "looking" at yet another face?

Friday, October 18, 2013

Final Self-Portrait: Extreme Close-Up with Grid [Realism]

This is the final self-portrait in a series of four.  This proved the most challenging.  I decided to implement an alternate grid, rather than the standard evenly spaced horizontal and vertical lines.  This grid was introduced to me during my undergraduate studies.  There are two diagonal lines that cross one another and meet in the middle of the image.  There are horizontal lines measured evenly from top to bottom.  This proves much easier when math computations are a challenge. 

Personal Feelings: I struggled with the idea of drawing a realistic portrayal of myself.  I chose to create a facial expression that best described this apprehension.  This facial expression became the subject matter of the extreme close-up self-portrait.  This allowed me to move beyond the apprehensions.  It was like my own personal joke or secret.  If I had started with this self-portrait at the first of my research, I think too much time would have been wasted on "personal" issues and less on the art of making the portrait.  This is key for classroom implications as well. Key Code: cloudy; cloudy; :-)

Classroom Implications: I would use this approach as a capstone to a long, involved Unit for learning. Self-portraiture should be developed over a lengthy period of time, to develop skills and confidence in students (Carroll, 2007).  For a lasting effect on self-identity, one lesson, even two lessons on self-portraiture are not going to yield sustained results.  In order to experience actualized, real identity changes, many factors must be challenged, increased, and developed.  Students must learn how to develop a visual narrative, increase in skill sets, discover inner courage to share with others, and develop other ideas about self that is not measured against or influenced by peers, possibly family, or even environmental factors.  This new knowledge has to come from within and extend outwardly.  Art, self-portraiture, active investigation into self, increased, informed personal awareness are essential elements that can effectuate a positive self identity. 

Grid:


Grid in Process with Initial Cartoon Drawing:


Final Drawing with Grid:


Final Composition:





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